{For Christmas this year my parents took guardianship of four boys... }
This meant that I got four guardian brothers... whether I wanted them or not. If I am going to be painfully honest this has been really hard for me. I am extremely proud of my parents for what they have done but that doesn't mean this has been an easy transition. I realize that I am a married college graduate with a job who maybe should not be seemingly affected by this life decision my parents have made but honestly the transition has taken a lot of growth on my part. I don't always like that I have to share my parents. I know these boys really need may parents but there are moments that I wish I just had my parents back to myself. I've grown to love these boys in so many ways. Honestly they are really great kids... but to suddenly share my parents with four boys six to seventeen year olds has challenged me and changed me.
{I know it's extremely selfish but sometimes I really miss having my parents to myself.}
Sometimes I think this transition has been easier for my parents than it has been for me. Even though I have very loving and awesome parents there are times when I call that they can't talk because of something going on with one of the boys. When I visit my family I don't get the peaceful time with family to catch up. Everything is loud and if I want to make a nice relaxing dinner instead it's a dinner for a minimum of eight. I know these are seemingly minor things and I'm not going to go into a lot more detail... I think the examples above suffice in explaining that life has changed.
{I just want to say a few things about some of my guardian brothers.}
The youngest three have stolen my heart. They are so dear to me... Each of them has grown so much and I am amazed at the transformation that is happening before my eyes. I am excited for the oldest of the boys. He gets this awesome privilege of some time with my parents before he heads off to school. The boys still visit their biological parents fairly regularly. I can't imagine going back and forth between homes even for visits but I think it is really cool that my parents still make the effort for the boys to know their bio-parents. I cant imagine this transition has been easy on the boys but each of them has been generally amazing. For the oldest I can't imagine moving in with a new family and for the youngest this must all be so confusing... but by God's grace this has all gone pretty well. I am excited to see what God continues to do... I know that he'll continue to challenge and change me... He is always working on my heart. To my guardian brothers... Someday I hope to tell them that they have challenged me in a beautiful way that has allowed me to grow closer to God in ways that I couldn't have expected. I hope the very best for them and I love all four of these boys. It will be interesting to see what God continues to do in challenging me and in challenging the boys. Prayers are very appreciated.
{If this is something that you're thinking about doing or that your family has done...}
Taking on guardian children when you already have a family that is grown up or out of the house will effect them too. Just because we are not there all the time does not mean that we are not impacted by this huge transition in your life. Thank you to my amazing parents for helping me as this continues to become a reality for me. Thank you to God that my new guardian brothers are sweet and seem to really want to do good. Honestly I think this is a beautiful thing. Even when I have felt my lowest about this transition I am still very proud of my parents for this sacrifice they are making. I hope if you make this transition that you'll do it prayerfully and with a lot of understanding for your children who have difficulty with the transition. My parent's grace has blessed me so much through this transition. It effects everyone differently. My sister seems to have no problems with any of this at all but for me I feel like my world's been completely changed.
{My parents have been amazing in loving me through this transition and pointing me to God but sometimes transitions are still difficult. I am grateful to know that all things work together for the good of those who love the Lord and I am grateful to know that God is at work in each of those boys even now. Things are changing... I am (whether I like it or not) becoming more flexible...}
One last thing... Hans has really blessed me in helping me with all of this. He has seen when these things have been the most difficult for me and he's loved me anyways. He's loved them and shown me how to love. He's encouraged me and reminded me to turn to God for my strength and love. I've heard that Hans means a gift from God... In this case he really fits his name. (Sorry to be gross and sappy)
{the end.}
[until later]
